Peer+review

Peer Review: Pamela

heading should be aligned to the left and double spaced. top margins should be .5 in. beginning with last name with page numbers. check the way you cited your references, should there be quotations inside the parentheses? One paragraph starts "Firstly", it would be better not to use that word at the beginning. On page 4, the first line, you could start your new paragraph at "Video games are not....."

1. the title is appealing, it makes you interested in reading what the paper has to say. 2. main idea is to tell why video games could be considered by some to promote violence. 3. referenced an article written on a website stating that video games could be the cause of some students being bullies in school. 4. the writer points out the positive side of playing video games, stating that it helps with problem solving and hand/eye coordination. 5. the strongest points are the quotes from the cited reference 6. although the writer has certainly put alot of thought into the subject, it would be stronger with more than one reference showing some statistics or the results of research. 7. no; my sons grew up playing some video games that were way more violent that I would've like and none of them are now violent adults. 8. the paper could be improved a little by using more than one reference concerning how violent video games do or do not affect children. 9. it seems that the quotations would not be needed within the citing for these particular references. 10. the works cited page follows the format for citing a web site with no author listed